Clear…

Normal and Cancer Cells
Picture credit: Wikipedia/ Pat Kenny (Illustrator)

 

Yes, I am finally back.

And, yes, I am as tired of saying that, as you likely are of hearing it.

Your many words of comfort and support have meant more to me than you will ever know.

At this moment and time, the ugly is all behind me and it would seem that God must have other plans for me because it is all over for right now, I am free of cancer.

You must know, however, that this is written today, while being completely distracted by the NASA channels coverage of Orion’s Odyssey.

This is such an exciting time for those of us here in Florida who are total space junkies and miss the glorious Shuttle days.

But, I digress….

This dark journey began for me two months ago, although, it seems like years, not months, when I had four biopsies done, after not seeing a Skin Doctor for 15 unforgivable years.

Two came back as melanomas, one a Basal Cell Carcinoma and the fourth was diagnosed as being just a really angry mole.

All have now been removed, sent to labs for diagnosis and closed.

The final one that was just angry, was done two days ago and the stitches will be removed next week.

Let the healing begin.

Then I/we  will be taking a cancer/skin sabbatical for a bit.

No, not for fifteen years like the last one that got me into this mess, just for a month or so…..

The most terrifying aspect of this entire ordeal, had to be the Mohs Basal Cell Carcinoma removal that was done last week.

Obviously it was the unknown factor that made it the worst.

Then there was the painful realization that it was to be done on my face.

Yes, this was, in my case at least, a girl thing, as some of us females do tend to get a little concerned about things that could have us ending up looking like the Bride Of Frankenstein.

For the past month, I have had nightmares and thought of little else except the endless possible outcomes of this procedure.

Going online to Dr. Google, not recommended, only gave me scary images and terrifying stories, to run and re-run in my mind.

I thought about leaving town and forgetting it altogether, but was too much of a coward to go.

So, finally the dreaded day came and I went in and faced the formidable unknown.

If this is a new process for any of you,  in a Mohs  Surgery, the doctor takes a small amount of tissue near the biopsied area and then examines it for cancer cells.

This step is repeated, until the area is determined to be free and clear of cancer.

In my mind, I imagined that it would take many cuts and I would end up with a small, or other sized crater in my face.

Yes, I admit it, I worked myself into a lather over this.

What an idiot I was.

So on D-day last week, I went into the office and was taken to a room, but what happened next was enough  to wipe away all of my fears and make my little corner of the world right again.

As I was beginning to put my gown on, a familiar voice came that made me nearly cry.

It was the first person I met  there and she had done my first four biopsies.

She had been absolutely flawless, just prefect and the  biopsies  had been quick and nearly painless..

Seeing her face come through the door on this dreadful day completely dispelled my worst fears.

I knew that if she was there, I could deal with whatever came next.

So, I was prepared for the surgery as usual, I also now believe, that I have enough lidocaine in my body from my numerous procedures, to numb a small town.

The doctor came in and took his first sample of tissue and left.

While he went off to do this, the stitches from my last melanoma surgery were removed.

We stayed busy, chatting and waiting, with me silently wondering how many times he would need to cut and how much skin would leave my face.

I tried not to think, just breathing was an effort.

Then, finally  he came through the door and like the other excellent surgeon who only a mere month ago had removed a life threatening melanoma and sentinel node, this one now also said that same sweet word that has since become my new forever favorite one:

Clear…